Meet Edgar Elephant

Posted on 20th August 2014
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Edgar Elephant

Name: Edgar.

Weight: Depends whether I’ve just eaten or had a ****. Well, you did ask! (Oops! I’ll be in trouble for that.)

Distinguishing features: Ears bigger than most Beano characters and a nose the size all noses should be. What use are those tiny things others have?
Despite what Monster and Bear will say, I AM the biggest of all. And I can’t jump to save my life.

Catchphrase: Aaaaarrrrgggg! There’s a mouse.

Likes: Purring (yeah, really). Trunk hugs. My family around me.

Dislikes: MICE. Peanuts. Bleurhhhh.

Favourite film: One lucky elephant. I know he was in a circus to start (he was an orphan before that) and now he’s getting a new home. Aaah!

Favourite music: Found a Peanut by Macabre. Shows why you should never go near the little devils. Anything by Bananarama. What?

Favourite Book: The Banana Split Book. Nom nom.

Food: I’m a herbivore, so if you’re name’s Herb you’d better watch out.
I also want to go to the Hay festival one day. Sounds brilliant.

Describe yourself in three words: Practically perfect pachyderm.

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